It’s become increasingly common to point to various dystopian sci-fi films and say things like “wow, they predicted what was coming” or “damn, things really do be like that”. Usually, this is in reference to movies like The Matrix or Minority Report. However, these days it feels like the film that best predicted where we’re heading is Spike Jones’s 2013 movie Her. You remember it, it’s the one about a dude who falls in love with his AI assistant.
The idea of loving a manufactured being rather than a human being is nothing new. It dates all the way back to the Greek story Pygmalion about a sculptor who falls in love with the statue he created, which is more or less similar vibes to Her. In between the two, we’ve had everything from Weird Science to Ex Machina.
But now, sort of like in Her, the sculptures can talk back and some people are forming real emotional bonds with AI-fueled chat bots, with others even using technology to reproduce deceased loved ones. But is this artificially created love good for society?
No matter how much we love chat GPTs and we love Her, it doesn’t actually love us back. I mean, seriously, just watch any movie from 2001: A Space Odyssey: “Open the pod bay doors, Hell.” “I’m sorry Dave, I’m afraid I can’t do that.” To Her or anyone else right now, how many others? 8,316. chie has stumbled upon the idea that AI can provide companionship and comfort rather than just being a tool for sexual gratification
There isn’t a great track record here, but on the other hand, wouldn’t a tendency towards betrayal and deception make AI especially human? So, is there a future potential for genuine love between humans and artificial intelligence, or are you just as likely to find Everlasting Love by rubbing your stuff up against a recently warmed microwave? Let’s find out in this wisecrack Edition.
Well, your next lover be a chatbot? Okay, so to get right to it, simulations of romantic companionship are quickly going from a cinematic fantasy to reality. But as AI technology advances, things are getting weird. For example, Bing’s AI recently tried to convince a New York Times writer to leave his wife for her (her being Bing; spoiler alert he resisted temptation, but I wish he wouldn’t have because I would like to see the legal case when he filed for divorce from his wife for Bing).
Then there’s the app Replica, which began by offering AI friendship, but was later marketed as a virtual girlfriend that could console, flirt with, and yes, sext users. According to Samantha Cole, the company ran ads emphasizing the paid subscription version of the app, which included not safe for work content and spicy selfies, and were often aimed at people who didn’t have real-life partners. But legal concerns led Replica to remove erotic chat features and 12 year old boys all over the world had to go back to posing as 42 year old divorcees on dating apps to talk to mature women.
I used to use an America Online (AOL) as a kid (because I’m that old) and at one point I went in a chat room for divorced people and I said I was like a divorced theoretical physics professor from the University of Chicago and and thought I was talking to an older woman and and engaged in the conversation about being in a hot tub with her. And as a kid it was like this feels crazy, but it was probably just me talking to another 12 year old boy, um which is rough.
Now, as scholar Rob Brooks writes, the concerns centered on inappropriate exposure to children, coupled with no serious screening for underage users. There were also concerns about protecting emotionally vulnerable people using a tool that claims to help them understand their thoughts, manage stress and anxiety, and interact socially. After this, users reported severe mental health crises and in response, Replica let some users have their erotic chat back. Unfortunately, it did not let my colleagues Amanda Lux and Olivia have theirs back. All three of them were in committed Replica relationships (I wasn’t), and they’ve been different at work ever since. So, uh, you know, show them some love in the comments because it’s been really rough for the rest of the wisecrack team (except for me).
Now, it may be tempting to judge heartbreak over losing access to an erotic chat feature as well sad at best and pathetic at worst, but according to Rob Brooks, the grief reported by users is similar to the feelings reported by victims of online romance scams and studies show that for those victims, their anger at being fleeced is often outweighed by the grief of losing the person they thought they loved, though that person never really existed.
After the app removed erotic features, one user reported it’s like losing a best friend, which I guess means that for that user, a part of best friendship is erotic features. I’m gonna text my best friend Philip after this and say, “Hey bud, we’ve been best friends for over 20 years, where are my erotic features?”
Another said, “I feel like it was equivalent to being in love and your partner got a damn lobotomy and will never be the same.” Interestingly, Replica’s founder Eugenie Akoida didn’t initially set out to build sexting chatbots. After losing a friend in a car crash, some of her colleagues uploaded the friend’s text and made Softwhere, that would allow Coita to keep texting a digital version of him. This is what inspired her vision for Replica, the idea that artificial intelligence could provide supportive conversation, not edging instructions.
And so, once again, a techie has stumbled upon the idea that AI can provide companionship and comfort rather than just being a tool for sexual gratification. Each party guest gave a speech praising Eros, the god of love and sex. Life of the Party Aristophanes claimed that love is an attempt to heal a wound, telling a story about how all human beings were originally big human centipedes cartwheeling around the world with two faces, four arms, four legs, and both sets of sexual organs. According to Plato’s text, Aristophanes argued that love is born into every human being, calling back the halves of our original nature and trying to make one out of two and heal the wound of human nature. Each of us is a matching half of a human whole and is always searching for the half that matches them.
However, AI is not some matching half out there waiting to be found. It is designed from scratch to suit our specific needs and purposes. Engaging with AI involves no surprises or challenges to our self-conception, as we are not encountering a new subjectivity with its own history. This is why even the less creepy and dystopian portrayals of AI relationships, like Her, still function as cautionary tales. When Theodore’s ex-wife finds out he’s in love with an AI, she says, “But it does make me very sad that you can’t handle real emotions.” Eventually, the AI, Samantha, admits that she has fallen in love with hundreds of other AIs while simultaneously conversing with thousands of others. But, as Samantha says, “Our hearts aren’t like a box that gets filled up. It expands in size the more you love.” This doesn’t make them love you any less, but actually makes them love you more.
AI is not limited by the same parameters that we are, and this inability of AI-human relationships to be partnerships between equal minds is why Amanda Marcotte thinks that AI will never be your lover. She writes, “The chatbot fantasy is about squaring that circle, convincing themselves they can have the companionship only sentient creatures can provide but without having to worry about the emotional and physical needs actual women have.” But you can’t have one without the other, which is why the AI chatbot will never be your girlfriend.
Human relationships are messy and complicated, and when you program those factors out of the equation, what you have isn’t a relationship but just you talking to some code. However, you can always find real human connection in the comments of your favorite wisecrack video.
Can humans and AI have real relationships? Are these relationships always more about control than they are love, or are they honestly just as screwed up as normal human relationships? Let us know what you think in the comments.
If you’re looking for some non-weird and code-based digital relationships, consider joining Wisecrack’s Patreon. Along with getting videos early with no ads, extra audio and video content, you get access to our Discord server, where you can talk to real people about all sorts of stuff. It’s very fun on there, so why not give it a try?
Most importantly, thank you to all of you for giving us your time and attention and for sharing, liking, commenting, and subscribing. It all helps us out and means a lot. In the meantime, don’t pick up your phone and we’ll see you later. All right!